My very own spawn.

I've been trying to figure out how to write this announcement in such a way that you all could share in the wonder and awe that I feel. Or is that icy terror? Hard to tell. . .

It's true: my wife is playing host to my parasitic spawn. I'll post some photos when the opportunity arises, but for now I will simply declare that I have known my wife and sired a daughter. We expect her to make an appearance in late February.

So in addition to the cradle, changing table and other furniture necessities, I will also be investing in firearms, security cameras, and robotic canine escorts capable of humane castration in 0.75 seconds.

--Hazmatt out--