I was reading a christian man's account of coming out over and over and how dear his community of gay, celibate Christians is and his struggle with it all in general today and it broke my heart a bit. On the one hand, who am I to say he can't have that strong conviction and make that choice and still be perfectly happy, you know?
On the other, I know that my view on being gay pre-gay-sex and post-gay-sex are night and day. Having sex with another man for the first time was the closest I've ever been to a spiritual moment since leaving the church. All my pre-conception about how wrong and guilty I would feel afterward melted away in a feeling of naturalness and completeness. For me it was a moment where the missing pieces all fit into place and I finally had a glimpse of what it meant to take comfort in physical intimacy of another human being. It was the opposite of awkward. It was the opposite of broken. It was a moment of genuine completeness, where I first understood the kind of completeness straight people had with each other, and that I could have that too. And, more importantly, that if a god embodying love existed, there was no way he would object to showing affection to another man that left me feeling so whole.
I guess if I could tenderly offer my advice to the well-meaning and celibate gay christian, it's to commit that particular "sin" at least once. Please don't spend your whole life segregating yourself behind sex-proofed glass because well-meaning straight christians are posing as experts on a topic they have very little actual experience with ,with only 3 questionably analyzed bible verses as their support.
Taste and see if it is good. I promise you, it is.
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