Tuesday, January 01, 2013

2013: The Year We . . .

In the spirit of 2010:  The Year We Make Contact (one of my favorite movies, adapted from one of my favorite novels by one of my favorite authors), I peer into my quantum split-screen and strain possible tag lines for 2013 from the flotsam and jetsam of probability space.

2013:  The Year We

  • Fix Everything
  • Fix Nothing
  • Get Naked
  • Lose Language
  • Find Jesus
  • Lose Jesus at the Outlet Mall
  • are Found
  • are Lost
  • Have a Pretty Idea of Where We Are, but  Are Too Embarrassed to Ask
  • Never Stop
  • Never Start
  • Brush Better
  • File Paperwork
  • Buy More Things
  • Uncover Conspiracies
  • Find Enlightenment
  • Pull Back the Curtain
  • Float Away into Space
  • Live Underground
  • Send Text Messages by Kite
  • Only Drive Backwards
  • Stop Being Shitty to Each Other
  • Decide to See What Being a Little More Shitty to Each Other Would Feel Like
  • Evaporate
  • Condense
  • Discover the Present
  • Find the Future
  • Lose Ourselves in the Past
  • Crack the Planet
  • Find the Wormhole
  • Discover the Terrifying Secret of Cheese
  • Trip the Light Fantastic
  • Realize it was All Just a Dream
  • Flail Helplessly About
  • Finally Crown Nicholas Cage our Rightful King
  • Find Hidden Truth
  • Realize No One Cares
  • Start to Give a Shit
  • Finally say, "Fuck It."
  • Fart without Fear
  • Enjoy What We Have
  • Want Even More
  • Make Contact and It's Scary
  • Make Contact and It's SO BORING
  • Learn How to Fly
  • Don't Stop Believing
  • Realize Argument by Picture Meme is Ineffective and Childish
  • Mediate More
  • Go Too Far Down the Rabbit Hole of Our Own Minds
  • Realize Everything is Fucked Up and Bullshit
  • Go Door to Door Selling People More Shit They Don't Want or Need
  • Just Vote the Entire Government Out
  • Sit Back and Just Watch Things Disintegrate
  • Try to Be Better
  • Give Up
  • Can't Shut Up
  • Don't Speak Much More than a Whisper
  • Go Crazy
  • Realize We've Been the Only Sane Ones All Along
  • Discover the Secret To Consciousness
  • Discover The Equation that Describes Everything
  • Drop the Ball
  • Drop the Other for a Matching Pair
  • Leak Everywhere
  • Use the Force
  • Grow Wings
  • Breathe Deeply
  • Discover the Perfect Philosophy for Life, the Universe and Everything
  • Kill the One Guy Who Can Fix Everything Before We Give Him a Chance to Speak
  • Believe Every Goddamn Thing We Hear
  • Believe Nothing Except from Behind a Double Blind
  • Stop Letting Other People Tell Us Who We Are
  • Give Much More Than We Take
  • Take Much More Than We Need
  • Perfect Our Trajectory
  • Are Translated
  • Are Lost in Translation
  • Stop Being Afraid
  • Can't Leave the House
  • Find the Happy Medium
  • Lose the Tormented Psychic
  • Eat Lest We Be Eaten
  • Decide to Grow the Fuck Up
  • Wallow in Endless Nostalgia
  • Fall Down
  • Skin Our Knees
  • Pick Ourselves Up
  • Pull the Other Down
  • Decide Self-Help is Bullshit
  • Eat Too Much Garlic
  • Walk Both Ways Up Hill
  • Spin Around Until We Throw Up
  • Make Peace With the Hipsters
  • Declare War on Wars
  • Lose the Plot
  • Find the Thread
  • Have Enough of Our Excuses and Bullshit
  • Hold Hands
  • Decide to Be Kind, Because Why Not?
There's a universe of possibility out there.  I am looking for the best one.  I'll let you know if I find it.  Until then, may the universe you resolve from the possible to the observed be the one that makes you happy.

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